Leading on from my previous post about autism and employment, this week I’d like to discuss the link between autism and homelessness. I was shocked to learn recently that people with autism are at a higher risk of experiencing and remaining homeless than the general population. Research varies, but estimates of autism in the homeless range from 3%- 18.5%. This is a staggering statistic given that autism in the homed population is roughly 1-2%.
But why are autists more likely to experience homelessness?
As I’ve mentioned previously, 75-85% of autists are unable to find and maintain employment. Moreover, many autists struggle with co-morbid mental health issues and can be more likely to suffer from addiction issues- all of which can be contributing factors for homelessness. As a result of these struggles, autists do not have the same means that neurotypicals do to reduce their risk of homelessness and the ability to change their circumstances once homeless.
Autism is a condition that thrives on routine, stability and regulation of sensory environments which homelessness only serves to exacerbate. The sensory struggles with weather, the unfiltered noise of the city, the nasty smells from your surroundings can be completely overwhelming. Your mental health is on a knife edge and symptoms worsen without support and understanding. Most countries already struggle to provide adequate resources for housed autists and the general homeless population, making it even harder to properly support homeless autists. There is a serious lack of understanding of autism among workers in the homeless sector, especially with regard to the female experience. Surveys among workers in the homeless sector in the UK and Ireland have highlighted these gaps with over 90% of respondents noting the low levels of support for homeless autists and the need for autism specific training.
This is clearly a challenging issue that needs care and consideration to properly support the autistic community in both preventing and reversing homelessness.
This week I’d like to discuss something that I have a very bad habit of engaging in- revenge bedtime procrastination.
And what pray tell is that when it’s at home?
You may never have heard of the expression, but it’s something that most 0f us have likely done at some point in our lives, especially for autists. Revenge bedtime procrastination (or RBP) is the deliberate act of putting off sleep in order to reclaim leisure time that was lost during the day, often after a busy and stressful one. The term was first coined on Chinese social media in 2014, where ‘revenge’ comes from taking back time for yourself, however, this behaviour is often self sabotaging resulting in poor sleep quality and deprivation.
For autists in particular, this behaviour is seen as a means of taking back control in a world where we often feel out of it. It’s a coping mechanism of sorts where we engage in this intentional sleep deprivation after an overwhelming day of sensory overload and social obligations. Taking back this time, while self sabotaging, is needed for self soothing, allowing autists to recover from the demands of living in a neurotypical world. Many autists struggle with executive dysfunction and ADHD, so organization and planning can be difficult, often leading to an out of balance day where routine can be difficult to maintain. RBP allows an autist to use their limited time at night for specialist interests and relaxation, where the cost of sleep is considered a worthy investment (or at least perceived as such til the next morning 😴).
I’m especially prone to this type of behaviour- I just wasn’t aware there was a word for it until recently. My schedule can be pretty hectic at times, often rolling home late at night, but despite my tiredness, I have to pull out my phone or a book for a while when I get to bed to veg out and decompress after the day. Other times, I tear into a few rows of knitting late at night, or tell myself I need just an episode or two of whatever show I’m currently binging before I can go to bed. I may be falling down from the tiredness, but there’s just something in me that pushes me to do these things before I turn out the light. Sometimes it’s this need to feel productive in my projects, other times its to zone out. It doesn’t matter how tired I’m going to be in the morning, my brain just needs those extra few minutes of me time.
It may not be the most sensible autistic behaviour, but with all the sleep issues autists experience at night, do whatever you need to do to reset your brain before bed 😌
Leading on from my previous posts about meltdowns, emotions and alexithymia (the inability to identify emotions in the self and others), this week I’d like to take a close look at the specific issue of displaced anger.
As I’ve discussed multiple times, autists process emotions differently to their neurotypical peers, often because they aren’t able to properly recognise what they’re feeling. In my experience, anger is one of the worst offenders. I have often had issues with displaced anger, misdirecting my wrath at everyone and anyone around me because I hadn’t been dealing with the source. Just walking around for weeks lashing out at the slightest annoyances because I hadn’t twigged that I was bothered by something else entirely.
Interestingly, I have also resorted to anger as a cloak in the past. I often found when on the verge of a meltdown being angry and rude were much easier emotions to project than what I was truly feeling. Anger was much easier to control, with less likelihood of dissolving into tears (not to mention the repellant effect). I just knew that were I to make eye contact or speak without anger in those scenarios, the floodgates would open, and it was too overwhelming to have to explain them.
There is also a cognitive emotional processing condition which can contribute to displaced anger outbursts known as anger rumination. This happens when an autist has a tendency to dwell on past experiences of anger and frustration. By focusing on these experiences, autists develop difficulties in properly processing and responding to anger. Persistent rumination on past stressors depletes your ability to self regulate resulting in behavioural inhibition, which makes you more hostile and prone to displaced anger outbursts.
While it’s never nice to be on the receiving end of these anger outbursts, try to bear in mind that you’re unlikely the cause. You might have triggered a reaction, but usually the issue runs deeper. Try to give an autist some space in these scenarios to give them time to calm down. Talking after the red mist has passed can be very helpful in allowing an autist to process their emotions in a healthy way in a safe, nonjudgmental environment.
This week I’d like to talk about a new type of autism that is emerging- virtual autism!
Em… what on earth is that?
No, it’s not some kind of futuristic disease or new computer virus. The reality of this condition is far more concerning.
Virtual autism is being used to describe a growing trend of developmental delays in children that mimic autism due to excessive digital device usage. In other words, screen usage is causing children to falsely present as autistic!
The term was first coined in 2018 by Romanian psychologist Marius Zamfir to describe behavioral abnormalities observed in children between the ages of 0 and 3 resulting from a lack of motor, sensory and social stimulation after spending >4 hours a day in a virtual environment. Symptoms observed include communication issues, social withdrawal, lack of eye contact, attention problems, sleep issues, physical inactivity, and developmental delays which overlap with the early signs of classic autism. Similarly, other studies have backed up these observations by confirming the presence of autism like symptoms in toddlers that used electronic screens excessively.
Whilst the condition is too new to be recognized as a genuine diagnostic form of autism, experts are nonetheless warning parents about the risks and dangers of virtual autism. The good news is that unlike other forms of autism, virtual autism is easily preventable by monitoring and restricting screen usage. Similarly, virtual autism can be reversed and improved in most cases by reducing screen time, encouraging face to face interaction and playing with toys. The brain is highly adaptable, especially in childhood, so fear not if you think your child is showing signs of virtual autism. If you are unsure if your child is truly autistic or showing signs of virtual autism, cutting out excessive screen usage is a good first step to rule out virtual.
Leading on from my previous post You don’t look autistic?, it seems that I might need to eat my words that no one looks autistic. Research in recent years indicates that autism may in fact have some physical attributes- in other words, there is actually an autistic look 🤯
Yep, I had to be peeled off the floor when I heard that- so many autists making jokes about not looking autistic and here we have science telling us that we do! 😂
So what does the research say?
Whilst there isn’t a specific definitive autistic look as with other genetic conditions like Down’s Syndrome, studies have identified the following facial features in autistic children:
Eyes are wider and spaced further apart
Broader upper face
Shorter middle face
Larger mouth and philtrum (i.e., the groove between your nose and mouth)
Others may also have a flattened nasal bridge, a longer philtrum, and a less pronounced chin
Similarly, studies suggest that 10-35% of autists have a larger head size than their neurotypical peers. The circumference of the head, particularly in males with autism, is much larger than average- a condition known as macrocephaly. This size difference is often linked to larger brain volume in childhood, thought to be caused by early brain overgrowth. Head size usually balances out in adulthood, but it may persist for some autists.
As with all autistic traits, not all autists may have these facial features (my mouth is so small my wisdom teeth had no room to grow), and the differences are so subtle it’s doubtful that the untrained eye will notice. The research is very limited, so these facial features may not even indicate an autism diagnosis, but still it’s a very interesting concept. Perhaps one day facial analysis may help speed up the autism diagnostic process.
Leading on my from my previous post about autism and ageing, this week I’d like to discuss whether or not people with autism look younger.
Yep, apparently there appears to be a link between autism and looking younger!
In my own experience, it has been mentioned that I look far younger than my age. I’ve always had a youthful complexion, but I’d just chalked it down to good skincare, genes and the lack of a man to turn my hair grey 😂 Never in my wildest dreams did I think that my autism might be linked to my appearance!
So let’s explore why autists look younger.
As I’ve discussed in my previous post about autism and joint hypermobility, some autists have co-morbid hypermobility conditions such as Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS). This causes structural tissues like collagen to be weaker and more elastic which causes stretchy joints. However, this increased elasticity can result in a more youthful appearance as the skin is more resistant to damage, which can delay or even prevent the appearance of wrinkles🫨
Facial expressions may also contribute to a youthful visage, as autists tend to produce facial expressions less frequently and for shorter durations than neurotypicals. A less expressive face = less wrinkles.
It’s also possible that our youthful appearance may be more behavioural than biological. A lot of autists tend to be introverted and prefer indoorsy activities away from the elements, especially those with light sensitivity. As a result, lower UV exposure may be preserving our skin from the ageing impact of the sun. My nickname was ‘Dracula’ as a teenager as I would spend summers indoors reading, often returning from sun holidays with little to no tan🙈. On another level, our tendency towards naivety, more childish interests and behaviours can make us seem younger by association rather than looks.
However, while the evidence does seem to suggest autists do look younger, there equally is evidence that some autists look a lot older. As much as EDS increases skin elasticity, it can also lead to thin, fragile skin that can be more prone to bruising, resulting in premature ageing. One study even suggests that autists experience a faster rate of ageing and that they have an older facial age. This may however be correlated to poor self care, lifestyle and the higher levels of biological stress experienced by autists, buuuttt the same can largely be said for neurotypical ageing🤷♀️.
Leading on from my previous posts about autism and love and sexuality, this week I’d like to discuss the psychological state of limerence and autism.
Who in the what now?
Yes it’s not a term I had heard of either, but it’s certainly something that I have experienced many times as an autist- I just never knew it was a thing!
Limerence is a strong feeling of infatuation with another person that may be confused for romantic feelings (though it can also happen in platonic relationships). We’re not just talking your regular crush, limerence can be an intense, intrusive, all consuming involuntary obsession, mirroring the experiences of addiction, withdrawal and OCD.
You’re completely consumed by your feelings for the other person whether you want to be or not. It can occur in a romantic relationship, with someone you barely know, or even someone you’ve never met like a celebrity. Unlike with real love however, the obsession is usually one sided, marked by uncertainty and driven by excitement, adrenaline, stress and confusion. It plays havoc with your mental health and in extreme cases can lead to compulsive behaviours like stalking and harassment. Autistic women are particularly susceptible to limerence as we have a tendency to make people our specialist interests.
So many times I thought I was in love in the past, but more and more since my diagnosis I felt that these incidences were passing infatuations. Limerence really hits the nail on the head. When I would fall for someone, I would fall hard out of nowhere for walking red flags, people that I did not want to be attracted to, but drawn I was. Lovesick is a good description of it as it’s like an illness. I would obsess over them, they would invade most of my thoughts, I’d say and do stupid things, getting high off the slightest interactions and becoming irrationally jealous when they would spend time with others. It’s not a want, it feels like a need, this compulsion t0 be with that person constantly.
On the surface it seems like a typical crush, but no crush is this destructive. Limerence wreaks complete havoc with your mental health. Like addiction, you can think of little else other than your next fix. You spend nights tossing and turning thinking of only them, feeling like you could burst or die if your feelings go unreciprocated for one more minute. You over-analyse every single interaction you’ve ever had, searching for the slightest shred of evidence that they feel the same, clinging on to the slightest scraps to keep the dream alive. Your thinking is so clouded you totally ignore every red flag or paint it green to keep the fantasy alive. Any time spent with them is marked by exhilaration, stress and anxiety all at once. There’s no calm like there is when love is truly there.
And when the bubble finally bursts it’s the worst feeling in the world as you grieve what never was. Well, maybe not always! Sometimes it’s a simple “thank you- next” depending on the severity of your limerence.
Is there any scientific reason why autists are prone to limerence?
As with many neurological aspects of the spectrum, it comes back to imbalances in neurotransmitters and hormones. Limerence triggers many of the same chemicals in the body that are released when in love, and given that so many autists have issues with alexithymia, it’s no wonder we can’t tell the difference. Autists often have dysregulated levels of key love hormones such as dopamine, oxytocin and serotonin which are involved in pleasure, reward, and attachment. So if these chemicals are out of whack, this can easily develop into limerence.
The object of your limerence is usually filling a gap in an attempy to balance the chemicals that your brain is desperately craving, so it’s kind of like a twisted form of self regulation- your brain creates these attachments to get it’s fix. Certainly some of my more serious attachments were formed during particularly tumultuous periods in my life with my brain forging these highs to counteract the lack of stimulation I was getting. Paramore’s song Brick by Boring Brick sums this up nicely- “You built up a world of magic, because your real life was tragic!”. 🫠🙈
Much better to find a healthier specialist interest like crafting or music- something that will stimulate the same chemicals with none of the side effects! 😉
This week I’d like to discuss a topic that many autists struggle with- boredom. We all know the feeling, that mental itch that makes you want to jump out of your skin, but for autists boredom can be so much worse.
Many autists, especially those with co-morbid ADHD, crave constant stimulation. As a result, boredom occurs more easily than neurotypicals. A simple lack of interest in a topic, if a task is too easy, or feeling overwhelmed can trigger boredom and autists will tune out fast. When this happens, it can lead to negative behaviours where an autist will act out and be destructive and disruptive, it might even trigger a meltdown in chronic scenarios (I have had this happen in work following months of tedious tasks🙈).
Boredom has always been a challenge for me. I constantly need to be working on something. In school I often got in trouble for reading/drawing/writing during class as I would get ahead of my work and need to keep my hands busy while waiting for the lesson to move forward. If anything they should have encouraged my habit for productivity in my downtime! 🤷♀️
But what does the science have to say?
As I’ve discussed previously, autists have higher levels of stimulating neurotransmitters and lower levels of calming neurotransmitters, so their neurons are firing excessively in the brain. When they aren’t able to channel this excess stimulation into something, boredom takes over which can lead to negative behaviours that cause problems. Autists also have dysregulated levels of the neurotransmitter dopamine- the chemical involved in motivation, pleasure and reward systems. When dopamine levels are low, motivation is low, so when an activity is not enjoyable, autists won’t have the brain power to engage and boredom will set in.
On another level, there have been reports from doctors claiming that FMRI scans of ADHD brains show that areas of the brain associated with pain light up when they experience boredom, suggesting that boredom might actually be a painful experience for neurodivergents. However, other neuroscientists have refuted this claim as the human pain response largely remains a mystery, so making this assumption from the data is a bit of a stretch.
You can imagine my surprise this week to discover that I have never written a post about overthinking and autism!
Before I was diagnosed, overthinking was probably one of my strongest autistic traits. My brain was often compared to a washing machine set on high spin going round and round and out of control. I analyzed every single detail of my life, rehearsed potential conversations and social scenarios (usually catastrophizing them), and mentally abused myself daily with self critique. I would spend hours on the pillow staring into space unable to sleep as my mind raced out of control. My brain would be going so fast my head would be on fire on the pillow with all the heat generated from my neural activity!
Granted, I still have a tendency to rehearse and think through scenarios from multiple angles, but I find it much easier to rein in the horses before they start to race. Knowing why my mind works the way it does was a huge help, enabling me to be much kinder to myself, but also firmly stop the thoughts when needed.
But are there any scientific explanations for why we overthink?
There are a number of potential reasons why autists overthink. Sensory sensitivities and social anxiety may trigger overactive thoughts as an autist tries to process overwhelming stimuli and social interactions. As autists can be quite detail oriented and rigid in their thinking, it can also be hard to pivot from certain thoughts leading to overthinking. On another level, overthinking could have a physical cause in the way our brains are wired. As I’ve discussed previously, autists have too many synapses (connections between neurons where information is exchanged) so the brain is over-connected. With so many extra connections and ways information can travel, perhaps over-connectivity could be contributing to the issue of over-thinking.
So is there anything that can be done to manage it?
Here are some of my top tips for reining in your racing thoughts:
Weighted blanket or a weighted plushie– weighted blankets have been a game changer in helping me to sleep at night. They are scientifically designed to dampen the chemicals that stimulate your brain so less stimulation means less racing thoughts
Keep your hands busy– diverting all your nervous energy from your brain to your hands is great to slow your thoughts. I took knitting back up in college to try to slow my mind and found it immensely therapeutic. I was so busy concentrating on what my hands were doing that my brain didn’t have any capacity to think about anything else. Similarly, I’ve found sculpture and cake decorating have the same effect, so get your hands stuck into a project!
Exercise– is there anything a good walk can’t cure? Exercise can be great to help manage overthinking. I find that spin classes are great to switch off as you have to concentrate so completely on the task you don’t have any space in your head for anything else
Talk it out– discuss some of your thoughts with a friend or family member. A problem shared is a problem halved. I buried so many negative thoughts for so long my mental health suffered greatly, but things got so much easier once I started to talk through my problems. You don’t need to shoulder your struggles alone
Write it out– similarly, writing out your thoughts can be very therapeutic. I’ve often found that the simple act of getting my thoughts on paper was enough to get them to leave my head
This week I’d like to discuss another more unusual autistic behaviour- pebbling.
Ah Aoife, you must be making these up now!
You couldn’t be more wrong!
Before I lose you completely, let me explain.
Pebbling is where an autist spontaneously shows their loved ones affection through thoughtful gestures and tokens. The behaviour is so named as it mimics the act of pebbling in penguins. Gentoo penguins mate for life, so when a male penguin is interested in a female, he will collect, smooth shiny rocks for her as part of the courtship ritual. If she is interested, she will use the pebbles to build a nest to lay eggs in. Here’s a clip of the penguins in action:
Autists often struggle with social interactions and displaying affection, but pebbling can be our way of making up for it. ‘I love you’ isn’t always easy to say, but pebbling does the talking. It’s our way of showing we love you and are thinking about you- a unique form of affection, communication and connection.
Personally, when I heard about pebbling, I immediately identified with it! I’ve been unconsciously pebbling the ones I love my entire life. If I’m out shopping, I will often pick up little trinkets that remind me of my loved ones and their interests, or I might grab their favourite treats to bring home. Other times I might bake their favourite sweets for no reason, or craft them something they might like, or just a simple gesture like offering to do something for them.
Not all autists display pebbling behaviours, and pebbling can take various forms, but it’s a pretty cool way to show love to the people you care about 🙂
A Is For Aoife Not Autism 