Autism and Going Away to College

Greetings Earthlings! 😀

This week I’m going to to talk about perhaps one of the biggest challenges for a teenage autist- going away to college.

Ah college, some of the best years of your life- but years that can be difficult to adjust to for people on the spectrum. Granted, going away to college is a huge step for anyone, but considering an autists’ difficulty with change the stress can be tenfold. Living away from home, living with new people, finding your way around campus, the lack of routine, social expectations etc.- it can be completely overwhelming!

When I think about preparing for college, it always put’s me in mind of this Blink-182 song:

I haven’t been this scared in a long time, and I’m so unprepared…

This is exactly how it felt for me when I went away to college- sure, I was sick of school and excited to learn new things, but it is still one hell of a transition! I definitely cried a LOT those first few days/weeks settling in.

But never fear- here are some tips that I found helpful for starting out in college:

  • Register with the university disability service– If you think you need a little extra support when starting out, don’t be afraid to ask. Even if you don’t currently need any of the disability support services the college offers, it’s always good to have the safety net there when academic problems related to autism arise
  • Join a club/society– I know it can be really scary and overwhelming at first, but you won’t regret it! There’s loads of societies to choose from, and surely one that will suit your interests- they even have Harry Potter societies and Quidditch teams in colleges now (which sadly didn’t come to my university until after I had graduated đŸ˜„ )  It’s a great way to meet like minded people, make new friends and give you a break from the books 🙂 And if there isn’t a society that you like, why not set one up?
  • Get to lectures early– This is one that could really have helped me out during my first few weeks in college (but sadly I tend to me a tumble out of bed, last-minuter in the mornings). Give yourself plenty of time to get to the right room/building; universities aren’t always designed well and can be an absolute maze to navigate (which won’t help your stress levels). But more importantly, this can help you to keep an eye out for people you know. In my first month in college, sitting in a lecture hall with 300+ science students, I found it very difficult to get to know people, and when I did get chatting, I found it even harder to physically find the same person to chat to a second time among the masses. In getting to class early, you can pick a prime seat to watch out for familiar faces so you can flag them down to sit with you
  • Get a head start on your assignments– An obvious one I know, but a critical one if you tend to be a last minuter. College life is stressful enough coursework aside; don’t risk needlessly stressing yourself out and melting down

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  • Invest in scented candles/air fresheners– If you’re anything like me, the smell of some unfamiliar dishes cooked by your roommates can turn your stomach! Find a scent that you’re comfortable with or something that reminds you of home when offending odors threaten your senses. But make sure you test it out before you buy it- some odors can be even worse than the offending stimulus (I had a bout of nausea from a Christmas Yankee Candle last year- although that could have been a side effect of the antibiotics I was taking! 😛 )
  • Buy a decent pair of earplugs/noise cancelling headphones– the night time activities of the average student can often impact sensitive ears (I went through a few weeks of insomnia in my first year due to late night partying, fire alarms and drunken doorbell ringing), so plan ahead to ensure you get your full nights sleep
  • Google, Google Google– When navigating a new city, Google is your best friend, Google Maps, Google Street View, Google everything! When you’re not feeling confident about your directions, where to find shops, college facilities, timetables for public transport etc., pull out your smart phone and within a few clicks you’ll have everything you need. I would not have gotten through college without Google Street View. It really helped to put my mind at ease when travelling to unfamiliar parts of the city/university and kept me from getting overwhelmed
  • Make use of video chats– Video chatting has become far more accessible than it was when I started out in college, but nevertheless having the comfort of Skyping my family every evening really helped me to settle in during my first year (after that I rarely needed this crutch). Seeing my sisters in the familiar office at the Desktop after they came home from school every day really helped the transition from my old routines to my new college life

Going away to college can be a very scary experience, but try not to stress it- everyone finds it tough at first, but before long you’ll wonder why you ever resisted this change 🙂

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Hope you enjoyed this post dearest Earthlings! 😀

Have a great weekend!

Aoife

Should I Tell My Child They Have Autism?

Greetings Earthlings! 🙂

So today we’re going to discuss a very important question when it comes to growing up with autism- should autists be made aware of their diagnosis?bitmoji185739333

Now this question is a little bit tricky.

On one hand, we have the parents who do not want their child to know at all; they want their child to grow up as “normally” as possible so that they may never be held back by the autistic label.

In a sense, part of me would agree with this approach. In a lot of ways, growing up undiagnosed was a blessing in disguise. I was never treated differently (well, by teachers at least- children are another kettle of fish!) and I grew up to be a “normally” functioning adult with a job and friends, never held back by the autistic label.

Buuuuuuutttttttt…

Whilst I can appreciate a parents desire for their child to thrive, the decision not to tell a child about their diagnosis ultimately amounts to sticking your head in the sand.

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We cannot ignore autism and pretend that it’s not happening. There needs to be interventions, strategies and most importantly, understanding.

We don’t just grow out of autism, we need to cultivate an environment so that we can grow around autism. Without self awareness, this will ultimately make life difficult for your child.

What if they found out some other way that they were autistic? If they overheard a teacher, accidentally caught sight of their notes or were taunted by another child? How would you feel if your parents kept something like this from you?

At the end of the day, your child needs to know about their diagnosis; maybe not today or tomorrow, but when the time is right, they will need to know.

Yes, there were some advantages to getting a later diagnosis, but ultimately, life would have been so much simpler for both my parents and I had we known that I was on the spectrum. We would have known how to manage meltdowns, my peers would have understood me better, I wouldn’t have tortured myself for being different- I would have understood and learned to better accept and love me all the sooner.

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So don’t worry about holding your child back, or upsetting them; take a deep breath and find a way to tell them- they will thank you for it in the end 🙂

Aoife

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